Networking jokes I never got to put in our newsletter

A TCP packet walks into a bar and says, “I’d like a beer.” The bartender replies, “You want a beer?” The TCP packet replies, “Yes, I’d like a beer.”


The problem with TCP jokes is that people keep retelling them slower until you get them.

The best thing about UDP jokes is that I don’t care if you get them or not!


So, what’s so great about being a multicast packet? Woah woah! Don’t all shout at once.


I’d tell you an IPv4 joke, but we ran out!

I’d tell you an IPv6 joke, but I just don’t think you’re ready for it!


The bad thing about proprietary jokes is you can’t share them with your friends.


“Wanna hear a flood joke?

Wanna hear a flood joke?

Wanna hear a flood joke?

Wanna hear a flood joke?

Wanna hear a flood joke?”


homo devil machine

snmp traps

Saw Alan Turing statue in Manchester.  Undoubted the evil father of the homosexualizing computer. Died of a lethal estrogen overdose contained within an apple – a fitting end to a grotesque monster. Steve Jobs saved that half-eaten apple and had it preserved his Cupertino lair.  The Apple symbol is on millions of devices today, a silent reminder of the depraved homolegacy of Turing.

[Pretty fucked up what they did to him especially after his work in WWII. I think the different interpretations of his death were encouraged to take the blame off the government for prosecuting him.]


The answer is D by the way. A and F are trick questions: traps are not gay by default on Cisco equipment.